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Wednesday, October 14, 2009
10:04 PM
Rawrrrr

I don't blog not because I don't want to but I m just too busy getting things off my hand !

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Sunday, August 23, 2009
5:07 AM
Caught in the middle.

I m finally back on track again from those
never-ending assignment , presentation and test .

I m currently having my sem break WwwOooots :)))))

Lots of things happened .
People come and go
.
I m still trying to cope on with living and surviving outside all alone .
Right now , I need a whole new LIFE ! seriously > <




I don't want to live a life without life !
I don't want to regret while looking back
at the past anymore [ which I do right now :( ]

I don't want to be something I m not and
end up living like this for the rest of my life :(






Things that I shud have notice it ages ago .
Damn ! I m so slow :(
I m going to let it all go .

I m not going to give a damn abt what ppl say abt it anymore :)
I m going to live the way I want ^______^








Life is a maze .
although I don't know where to go :(
and I don't know why .
But I believe I will eventually find my way .

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Sunday, July 19, 2009
4:07 PM
Away

I m having fever now
sneezing non-stop
my head is going to burst soon
I don't feel like eating today
I m feeling very empty

Why do I always let ppl down ?
Why do I always say things that I don't mean ?
Why do I always end up hurting ppl around me ?


I m sick of myself
I m sick of being who I am now
I m sick of doing the same old boring routine
I do everyday
I m sick of everything


I need to breathe
I need a break
I need to escape from here


I don't even know why I am here now .
I don't even know what I m doing now .



Everything seems so wrong right now

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Friday, July 17, 2009
1:04 PM
Lost Inside

unspoken thoughts








can u really understand me ?








do u know how I feel ?








Everything wasn't okay at all

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Sunday, July 12, 2009
1:34 AM
Don't judge me cause I'm different

It's been awhile ...
I stopped updating my blog ...

There's alot in my mind ...

in fact I have many undone half way post piled up in my draft ...
There're times when I logged into my acc ..

and .............................................................
So , forgive me will ya ? :)))) * puppy eye > <



There's alot of ppl around me ...
People I like ...
People I love ...

People I hate ...
People that annoy me ...

People that I care ...

People that I don't give a damn ...

People that doesn't mean anything to me ...


and I can't possibly please everyone can I ?

As we grow up we hav to go on our different path ...

Things will never be same again ...
u can choose whether to accept me or not ...
and SO DO I !

My life doesn't just revolve around you
...
With u or without u ...
I shall move on .




***********************************************

Micheal Jackson passed away ..
I stayed up till 5o'clock watching the memorial
( I ♥ the part when Paris Jackson spoke)

while doing my assignment ( note : I m not his fan tho)
and people around me ...
started asking ...
"do u hav mj ..blablabla song ? "
"do u hav mj blablabla ......? "

wth people ....
stop acting like u care ...
If u happen to care ...
why didn't u care when he's still alive bak then?




Like an artist who sells his art at an extremely low price
when he's still alive and able to draw ...
no one notice the artist art ...
until the artist die and the price of the
drawing he once draw increase like mad ..
and people start searching for it ...

Why can't u care when they're still alive?
Why can't u appreciate it when they're still alive?


Things would have been
better if u care even a lil when they're still alive .

*******************************



Never be afraid to show who u really are

&



cutee lil doggie ^^





ps: Final is around the corner not to mention my undone assignment that piling up my table > <>



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Wednesday, May 27, 2009
3:03 AM
Laugh.Live.Love

It's been awhile ...
Sorry for the late update ...
I m getting busier as usual ... :(
A bunch of undone/untouched assignment there waiting for me :((((
not to mention the deadline is reaching soon ...
Seriously ... it's fvcking frustrated ...
why am I so bad at managing time ?

Oh ya... I just watched "P.s: I love u "...
During my class last Friday ...
Damn ... I think my eyeliner smudge > <
It's waterproof tho ...
I think I accidentally rubbed it or ...
All of us look terrible after the movie ...
I can see ppl wiping their tears of the light being turn on ..
and during the movie I heard sniffing sound XDDDD
I thinks this movie is not bad but my fren said the book is better :p
same for "Angel and Demon "
gosh ... the book is way way way better ...
I like the book better ^^

" what do girls want ? "

"The truth is girls don't know what they want ... "



:p
I cut my hair again
It's freaking short ...
I looks like a boy > <

*I will upload the pic of it soon :DDD ...



I wish ...
I have a little time being on my own ...
Where I could be myself ...


Laugh.Live.Love
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Tuesday, April 21, 2009
6:06 AM
H-o-L-i-D-a-Y ~

Everything is over ~ Yeah
Finals and crappy assignment ~
It's my H-o-L-i-D-a-Y and
I am slacking off doing nothing ~ XDDD


* Continue reading .. if u are interested in gossiping or bitching :p *
[ I has been struggling/considering for the longest time ...
whether shud I post it or not ... ]






Rmb abt post I talked abt before this?
I warned ya ... Hahaha [ I can be very mean at times ]
Here it goes ...
The "thing" started with someone who I refer as " L"
L , someone .. who is EXTREMELY " busybody"
she is those kinda of ppl who can mix very well with the aunties
[ trust me ... I saw it with my own bloody eyes ... ]
This is the 1st sem ,I am doing my degree and
the most regrettable thing I did to myself is to ...
group myself up with L for assignment and stuff...
[ YES .. I know ... I am mean ! but I am just being honest... > < ]





L never cares abt assignment nor due dates ...
I fvxcking hav to correct her works tat's being plagiarized ...
she thought tat I am some Fvcking idiots
who wouldn't notice her plagiarize works...
She expect ppl to do her works for her ...
clean up her mess...
hey ... I m not very good in writing too and
I also need ppl to clean up my mess but ...
the ONE & ONLY thing I couldn't stand in my life's
PLAGIARISM !
Guess wat ?
The only thing she is busying while everyone is
doing and contributing for the assignment is .....
GAMES ... bloody games ...
go on ... become a gamer , why study ?
why am In getting angry unreasonably ?

Here is one of the most " Fantastic" conversation between L and me ...

J: hey ur works don't hav the .....
L:harr... need to do arrr ?
J:of coz .. it's written there .......
L:oh ... but I dunno leh ...
J:izzit, but I also don't really understand abt it ...
L:hmmm .... ok la.. good luck , I go play
GAMES 1st .....

BLOODY HELL ......
Shit u !!! damn it ....
and she constantly calling me up
to do her a favor ....
and she Expected ppl/me will help her ...
For example ....
I have to print out the assignment for the whole group ...
and I didnt even say or mention anything abt it ..
L , on the others hand called me up to help print out
her own personal stuff ... [ very clever ]
and she even wanna to come my house for the internet....
NO NO NO

I don't wanna u to come near me ....
and Hey ... I m not ur bloody MAID ....
and L even question me abt
why u don't want to print for me" thing" ...
I am not a very hardworking nor a very smart person too ..
I also need helps at times but I wouldn't dump
all my works towards another person ...
I am happy to help any of my friends ...
But not those who doesn't value and appreciate it ...
and those who depend and wait
other ppl to finish up their works for them... Boo ~



The 2nd things I can't really stand is ...
L's hobby .... pretending/acting CUTE ...
L is bloody taller and bigger than me 2x
she used her fake voice and tried acting 'so' cute ...
hugging my shoulder and
act as if she is a little cat of mine ...
But ... L ... I am very sorry to tell u that ...
I HATE cat .....
I HATE ppl sticks so close to me ...
I felt disgusting ...
I can't help but to reject hugging by ppl I do not favor ...
and she acted as if I am her "BF" ... Lols



The 3rd reason why I dislike her ...
She is someone who do not get hints ...
I do don't know whether if she really do don't get it or
playing dumb to get it ...
There are times she assumed herself that
I am in her group ...
when I already ignore
, put up my sour face and show it to her ...
yet L ... still do not understand ,
when ppl around me started to notice and ask ...
but in the end she still get the wrong msg ...
a quote from L
" haiya ... I am always being abandoned in behind 1 larr... "
Listen here ...
I never wanna to talk to u in the 1st place...
It's not counted as abandoning ... It shud be ignoring ...
sometimes I do pity her ... [ YES , I DO ]
but there are just simply sympathy ...
there are times when she felt she is being "NEGLET "
her spelling not mine ...
when we went shopping or outing without her...
how can she assume we neglected her ..
when she is not even in the list from the beginning...
[ I m sorry .. but this is the fact ... ]
I do not wanna to go out with her and ignore her in a corner ...
That will be even worst ... > <


The 4th reason ...
Why I can't be friend with her ...
another famous quote from her ...
" U think I very rich ah ? "
"U think I am same with u all arr ... [sweats =_= "]

I heard this for the very first time when we wanna
to go Oldtown for a drink ...
But the weirdest thing happened all the times...
L is always the one who ordered the most expansive food among us ...
and she has got money to buy "card" or something for games ...
According to L , her house own a "MPW " car and
she got MAID in her house ...
oh .. I see ...
so ... this is "POOR" ... in her definition ....
[ I heard that her family is buying new Lcd and
video cam ..so this is wat we call poor ... I wonder ... really ...
> <]


The 5th thing ...
L cannot keep secret ...
She will go on repeat each and every words
ppl/me tell her on a casual conversation to
another 3rd party/the person we gossip abt ...
She will always starts her conversation with
" I heard from ..... tat ....... u ....."
OMG
.... I wanna to smash her ....
How could u....
It was supposed to be only between you and me ....
I encounter this when I met her for the 1st time
and mention something
abt my new housemate who she doesn't even know ...
The next day .. she goes to my housemate and .....
poof .... blurt out all things to her ....
Shit u ~




The "L" things that I wish I do not know~
I understand everyone has their very own habit ..
But ... L ... likes to
squeeze pimples on her chin [ ewhh ]
in CLASS !!! and she takes picture of it .... [ her chin ]
She also likes to sleep in class and then goes and
label/critic others ppl as " LAZY " while she is very
very very " Hardworking " ....



I knows I am being mean here ...
but I do not wish to pretend to like someone
when I do not ....
I do pity her at times when she was alone ...
But ... I still couldn't do it...
Someone asked me ...
" Why don't u confront it to her ... tell her everything ? "
I understand "L" very well and
I knew she would cry if I tell her ...
And I can't stand ppl crying ....
Maybe .. L isn't as bad as I thinks she is ...
But right now at the moment ...
all I can see is the thing that I do not like ...
everything she do seems wrong to me ...
everything she said annoyed me ...
I don't know why ....
But .. I can't help it ....
I know that I am selfish , bad , mean or ......
But I do not want to be a pretentious ...
putting up a fake smile anymore .... > <





There's no way I could accept "L" now ...
let me cool down for sometimes ...
maybe after sometimes I can take her back in ...
but things around won't be the same anymore ...
What is being done ... is done ... > <


ps: I has been talking abt her for months now ....
I thinks I shud stop now .... I shud end it here ....
I felt extremely bad and sorry to my friends and ppl around me ...
I really felt bad and mean for talking ppl like this ...
but I really do need a place to let it out ...
Shit ~ This is ruining my whole image .. > < Shit shit shit > <

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